Throughout the semester, prompts based on class readings, screenings, lectures, and discussions will be posted on this blog. Responses will be graded on their level of critical thinking, pertinence, engagement with class texts, and grammar/spelling/proofing/
length. Be sure to read the prompt carefully and fully engage with the content of the class materials. At the bottom of your response, type your FIRST NAME and the FIRST INITIAL OF YOUR LAST NAME (e.g. Claudia Z.).
Thursday, April 27, 2017
Week Fourteen: Response 14.1
Using examples from Katz’s chapter “Bystanders,”
describe how culture pressures boys and men to “measure up” and “act like a
man.”
In our society, men are conditioned to police other men about their behavior and actions through challenging their manhood and/or their sexuality in ways such as calling them a 'pussy' or a 'fag.' There are even codes of conduct out in the world that challenge men to live by their credo, credos such as "The Bro Code." As a man, I do have to say that I have in fact read The Bro Code, and while it is a funny piece of literature, I can also see how some men might consider the Code to be there bible, despite the book being nothing but a work of fiction. It has tired old saying such as 'Bros before Hoes' and 'Bros don't cuddle,' as well as sayings like 'Bros don't cry unless they are watching Field of Dreams' and 'A Bro must alert a fellow Bro to the presence of a girl fight.' The first two are old, and everyone knows what they imply, namely, put your fellow men above women, and don't do anything that could be construed as 'gay.' The last two, are a little harder to decipher. My take on them, is that the ‘Do not cry...’ quote is meant to reinforce the notion that men shouldn't show emotion, unless it is about sports, which Field of Dreams is. The last one seems to place women at the level of an object that is solely to be used for the pleasure of men, namely fighters for the enjoyment of the watching men. Men have this innate need to be ‘one of the guys,’ a phrase that garners a bit of a shield for the men who are part of ‘the guys.’ When you are one of the guys, all of the sexist comments, all of the ‘manly opinions’ that you might share amongst ‘the guys,’ are validated. This is a powerful tool, because who doesn’t want to feel that their opinions are valid, who doesn’t want to feel like part of a group, especially when we live in a society where men are pigeonholed into behaving and acting a certain way if they have any hope of achieving societal status.
“A man’s home is his castle, an one tells the king how to treat his subjects.” (Pg. 117) Due to statements like these in our culture boys and men are pressured to “act like a man” and “measure up”. Katz also describes how what happens between a man and a woman in their home is confined to the domestic sphere. Bystanders, men and even women who are aware of sexual abuse or violence of any kind take the “[It’s] none of my business” stance. (Pg. 116) Katz presents this in an example from Seinfeld in 1988. The four main characters were put on trial for watching and laughing a woman get car-jacked by a gang. Since the characters knew what was happening and knowingly let it continue, they were tried as a “guilty bystander”.
In contrast men who speak up about sexual abuse and violence and don’t take the bystander role would “lose status among his male peers and forfeit the approval of older males.” (Pg. 117) This causes men to encourage bad behavior as a way to remain part of the group in fear of “[losing] respect, friends and status”. (Pg. 117) In another example Katz explains how this behavior is praised within male society. A Hollywood film from 1988, The Accused, was based on a true incident that took place in a Massachusetts bar. The film told a semi-true story of how a woman was gang raped in a bar while another group of men bystanders cheered on the gang encouraging the violent act. Film resulted in the bystanders being convicted of a crime when in reality the men that witnessed the “real-life incident in 1938 at Big Ban’s bar” weren’t charged at all. (Pg. 115)
Katz explains how the male culture needs to be educated on how their behavior influences others. Behavior like sexual abuse and violence against women is understood to be inappropriate even if it takes place in their own home.
It is said that boys and men from every class, race, ethnicity, and nationality face enormous pressure to be “one of the guys”. Every boy has memories of wanting to be chosen when a group of boys choose sides for playground games. Pressure does not end with childhood and adolescence, it begins there. In the chapter “Bystanders”, a 20 year old man might feel pressures from his buddies to drink lots of alcohol and then shout obscenities at women outside the car window. Also, a 40-year-old's friends might tease him about “who wears the pants” in his marriage if he make less money than his wife or has less professional success. This shows that throughout the durations of a man's life, from adolescence to teen to adult, they have pressure on them to “measure up” and “act like a man”. It is said that part of the challenge that men, young men, and adolescent boys face is to figure out how to “act like a man” and earn other men’s respect and approval. Some boys learn these powerful lessons of “manhood” from their fathers and some do not have fathers so they have nobody to teach them how to be a man unless they have a father figure. Boys and men are constantly looking at each other for cues about where in the man's “world” they will fit in. They want guidance to find out how they should dress, carry themselves, interact with others, what they should say and not say, and how “real men” treat women. There are many different types of masculinity that boys and men can fall under. There is the boy scout, the gang member, the boy on the athletic team, or the college guy who found himself in a fraternity. These male social groups provide a source of information to group members about what men value, and what they consider as wimpy and unworthy of respect.
In the chapter, “Bystanders,” culture pressures boys and men to “measure up” and “act like a man” in a couple of ways. One of the examples is when Katz states, “A twenty-year-old man might feel pressure from his buddies to drink copious amounts of alcohol and shout obscenities at women out of car windows” (Ch.7 Pg.98). Nowadays, peer pressure is very common amongst men. Constantly, men want to prove to their friends about them being manly and will do anything it takes to prove it. Many people are influenced very easily and will call these women all sorts of names to prove to their friends that they’re tough and not “soft”. For example, I’ve grown up with a few friends who constantly call their female friends, “bitches” because they want to prove to us that they are tough guys and can call women anything they want. In reality, none of us care, but some of these guys think it’s cool or influenced and pressured by other friends. Another example Katz states in this chapter, “A forty-year-old friends might instead tease him about who wears the pants in his marriage if he makes less money or has less professional success than his wife and their disapproval-even if it is presented in a light hearted manner-might feed his resentment of her” (Ch.7, Pg.98). This is another great example that reminds me of one of my friends getting married soon. I have a friend who is getting arranged married soon. However, he was hesitant to marry this girl because she was a doctor and he was just an accountant. He didn’t want society to think or look down on him. In our Indian culture, many people look at the income and educational levels of people who are getting married. He kept thinking that all his friends will look down on him or tease him because all the other males make more money then their wives. We live in the 21st century and females are also human beings just like males. Females can also educate and get high paying jobs. For example, my sister married someone from India and she earns much more money then him. It doesn’t necessarily mean that the she wears the “pants” because she is earning more money. It is just pressure from culture that makes men think they’re less manly and somehow need to prove and act like a man.
In the chapter, “Bystanders,” culture pressures boys and men to “measure up” and “act like a man” in a couple of ways. One of the examples is when Katz states, “A twenty-year-old man might feel pressure from his buddies to drink copious amounts of alcohol and shout obscenities at women out of car windows” (Ch.7 Pg.98). Nowadays, peer pressure is very common amongst men. Constantly, men want to prove to their friends about them being manly and will do anything it takes to prove it. Many people are influenced very easily and will call these women all sorts of names to prove to their friends that they’re tough and not “soft”. For example, I’ve grown up with a few friends who constantly call their female friends, “bitches” because they want to prove to us that they are tough guys and can call women anything they want. In reality, none of us care, but some of these guys think it’s cool or influenced and pressured by other friends. Another example Katz states in this chapter, “A forty-year-old friends might instead tease him about who wears the pants in his marriage if he makes less money or has less professional success than his wife and their disapproval-even if it is presented in a light hearted manner-might feed his resentment of her” (Ch.7, Pg.98). This is another great example that reminds me of one of my friends getting married soon. I have a friend who is getting arranged married soon. However, he was hesitant to marry this girl because she was a doctor and he was just an accountant. He didn’t want society to think or look down on him. In our Indian culture, many people look at the income and educational levels of people who are getting married. He kept thinking that all his friends will look down on him or tease him because all the other males make more money then their wives. We live in the 21st century and females are also human beings just like males. Females can also educate and get high paying jobs. For example, my sister married someone from India and she earns much more money then him. It doesn’t necessarily mean that the she wears the “pants” because she is earning more money. It is just pressure from culture that makes men think they’re less manly and somehow need to prove and act like a man.
Young boys are taught not to be emotional to become a man. Being a man you cannot cry or show signs of vulnerability. Men are raised differently than women in every culture. Boys are not expected to wash dishes but mown the lawn, they are not given chores that girls do. Boys are not allowed to cry, their parents teach them to man up when they are dealing with difficult situations. If a guy does girly things or shows any affections towards women they are given many offensive names like “gay”. Boys are expected to like sports, play with cars, and hang out with the guys. They are more pressure to party during college and also date. Because men are involved in parties and alcohol, friends encourage them to hit on girls and can lead to forcing the girl in having sex, otherwise his friends will call him of being gay. Men are taught to provide a home and shelter for his wife. He is the one that has the power and control over what goes inside his home. The wife has to be a staying home mom and wait for the husband to get home. Women who are physically and emotional abused are afraid to stand up for themselves because they believe that is the only man that will love her. People who witness this situation do not speak up because they think the woman is happy and the man is always right. The wife probably did something to piss off the husband. When the husband lets his wife take control in their home, people start to gossip that he doesn’t wear the pants in the relationship. It downgrades his sexuality and becomes a problem to society. Men are expected to be controlling and dominant in the relationship. Because society approves this social roles, men are still raised to be strong and not vulnerable. Through movies, songs, and media, to be a man, you have to be manly enough.
The way society has pushed boys into becoming a “man” is conditioned in a negative way and leaves no room for the other; By other I mean the difference between men that should be elevated instead of discriminated against. The phrase “act like a man” basically means to not be a “sissy, bitch or fag,” and to be strong and hold dominance- all of these actions they hold are negative because when a man is dominant, he is usually hurting a women or engaging in negative behaviors but he is getting by through life because he is a man and it’s just what men do. And when a woman is being dominant and or strong there is no other action she is displaying other than being a “bitch.” Or when Katz says that women must take safety precautions like, “women being advised not to put their drinks down at parties; to park in well-lit areas; to recognize the warning signs of abusive relational behaviors, etc.” These precautions shouldn’t be rendered into people’s heads because if there was a safe world and safe men out there that didn’t have to feel pressured to measure up and be a man, none of this would be happening towards women. Bystanders lie on both spectrums and they are negative either way, but the way bystanders reflect on a men’s life is more crucial because of the entrapment these boys and men face by not being allowed to be individuals, be respectful and be positive. There is a lot of responsibility for men to hold these demeanors of being a man and when they don’t want to act like a “normal” man and want to speak out for women and stick up for what is right and not what is gendered to be right, they get bashed on and this is the pressure they are facing every day to fit in with. Jackson Katz states that they are average guys and many of them see the sexist treatment of women as normal. They behave toward women the way they think men are supposed to and these are bystanders when it comes to respecting men and respecting women. These boys will always be pressured into sticking by the “bro-code” and it is safer to stay silent than to speak out because you will be called names for doing so because a man who engaged in such behavior would lose status among his male peers and forfeit the approval of other males.
In the Chapter “Bystander,” the cultural traditions of manhood bring a huge challenge to men because they have to “measure up” or “act like a man.” They are always pressured to live up to the standard and feel like they are entitled and should always demonstrate their masculinity to prove a point to other men. This happens gradually to men throughout their life because most men feel this way because they are taught through their fathers. Over time, they start to follow other rules involving their manhood the idea of the “The Bro Code.” This in a way was said as one of the rules that live up to the male society. There is a lot of male pressure of “every class, race, ethnicity, and nationality” that stimulate to this and it is said to be okay because it makes any man “one of the guys.” This causes men to be aggressive with women and be more negative towards them. An example “….a nineteen-year-old Berkeley engineer student, David Cash, stood outside the bathroom of a Las Vegas Casino as his friend sexually assaulted and murdered a seven-year-old girl. When asked why he didn’t intervene, even though he knew something terrible was happening, Cash asserted that it was none of his business…” (Pg.116) This was a way to brush out any serious incident because men are just following what they felt was what a man should do. “Potential perpetrators...most men do not identify themselves this way. In fact, many men who have been convicted of gender violence crimes still believe they are somehow different from the sorts of men who do terrible things to women.” In a case like this, Katz explains that men need to be more education in the choices they make and shouldn’t engage in situations like this. They need to somehow work on their skills involving communication, listening, and behaving to prevent serious situation between women and to change the idea of male culture.
In a day and age where the “Guy Code,” is perpetuated throughout society so seamlessly that it has become popularized as a television show on MTV, young boys begin to adapt the ideals and stereotypes that reinforce notions of masculine stereotypes which ultimately shapes their behavior for the future. The constant pressure faced by young boys to become a man by the dominant masculine culture is present in so many facets of life. From early adolescence, or rather earlier childhood, boy’s minds are consistently being taught how to “act like a man.” However the ideals and stereotypes they are learning are reinforcing notions of masculinity that deter young boys from becoming young men. “Part of the developmental challenge men face—especially adolescent boys and young men who are trying to establish successful adult identities is to figure out how to “act like a man” and thus earn other men’s respect and approval” (Katz, 2006, Pg. 119). This innate desire to be like and approved is in human nature, however for young boys the desire becomes a requirement, because if they do not mold themselves to the unattainable standards upheld by the masculine dominant culture, they will be penalized/punished. Though it is such a common occurrence to see men adapt to the conformities of masculinity, the trait is not biological, but rather lessons that are learned. In fact, some of the biggest lessons men face are the ones they learn from their fathers. (Katz, 2006, Pg. 119) However, even in the absence of a father men look at other men for social cues on how to appropriately act as a man. Perhaps the most “effective method,” men utilize to ensure men “measure up,” and “act like a man,” is through policing mechanisms. The first one being ostracizing men who speak out about injustices like sexism, often imposed by the men instigating the remarks. As Jackson Katz remarks, “Men are silent about these issues (domestic and sexual violence) because other men keep them silent. They do not want other men to challenge their sexism, so they send off a clear message to “stay out of my business.” (Katz, 2006, Pg. 125) They silence them by demoting their status as less of a man, and even feminine. As a result, “when men do not “measure up: in those terms—and many do not—they often keep their objections to themselves as not to threaten their standing in the group.” (Katz, 2006, Pg. 123) Though it contradicts the notion that standing up for justice exhibits masculine strength over contributing to the mob mentality, men would rather prevent being excluded from the dominant group. Furthermore, the second policing mechanism that men utilize is to take jabs at their sexuality. Where nearly every accidental touch exchanged between males is quickly greeted by the phrase, “no homo,” it becomes a learned behavior that stigmatizes the sexuality of homosexuals, so much so that it is something to be repulsed by. As Jackson Katz concludes the chapter, “many men will predictably conclude that it is better to suffer other men’s sexist treatment of women in silence than to run the risk of having someone think they might be gay. (Katz, 2006, Pg. 130). It’s truly unfortunate that these ideals are being instilled into the developing minds of young boys, hopefully with more awareness and a shift in cultural ideologies, these long-running stereotypes will cease to exist.
In our society, men are conditioned to police other men about their behavior and actions through challenging their manhood and/or their sexuality in ways such as calling them a 'pussy' or a 'fag.' There are even codes of conduct out in the world that challenge men to live by their credo, credos such as "The Bro Code." As a man, I do have to say that I have in fact read The Bro Code, and while it is a funny piece of literature, I can also see how some men might consider the Code to be there bible, despite the book being nothing but a work of fiction. It has tired old saying such as 'Bros before Hoes' and 'Bros don't cuddle,' as well as sayings like 'Bros don't cry unless they are watching Field of Dreams' and 'A Bro must alert a fellow Bro to the presence of a girl fight.' The first two are old, and everyone knows what they imply, namely, put your fellow men above women, and don't do anything that could be construed as 'gay.' The last two, are a little harder to decipher. My take on them, is that the ‘Do not cry...’ quote is meant to reinforce the notion that men shouldn't show emotion, unless it is about sports, which Field of Dreams is. The last one seems to place women at the level of an object that is solely to be used for the pleasure of men, namely fighters for the enjoyment of the watching men. Men have this innate need to be ‘one of the guys,’ a phrase that garners a bit of a shield for the men who are part of ‘the guys.’ When you are one of the guys, all of the sexist comments, all of the ‘manly opinions’ that you might share amongst ‘the guys,’ are validated. This is a powerful tool, because who doesn’t want to feel that their opinions are valid, who doesn’t want to feel like part of a group, especially when we live in a society where men are pigeonholed into behaving and acting a certain way if they have any hope of achieving societal status.
ReplyDelete-Christopher D.
“A man’s home is his castle, an one tells the king how to treat his subjects.” (Pg. 117) Due to statements like these in our culture boys and men are pressured to “act like a man” and “measure up”. Katz also describes how what happens between a man and a woman in their home is confined to the domestic sphere. Bystanders, men and even women who are aware of sexual abuse or violence of any kind take the “[It’s] none of my business” stance. (Pg. 116) Katz presents this in an example from Seinfeld in 1988. The four main characters were put on trial for watching and laughing a woman get car-jacked by a gang. Since the characters knew what was happening and knowingly let it continue, they were tried as a “guilty bystander”.
ReplyDeleteIn contrast men who speak up about sexual abuse and violence and don’t take the bystander role would “lose status among his male peers and forfeit the approval of older males.” (Pg. 117) This causes men to encourage bad behavior as a way to remain part of the group in fear of “[losing] respect, friends and status”. (Pg. 117) In another example Katz explains how this behavior is praised within male society. A Hollywood film from 1988, The Accused, was based on a true incident that took place in a Massachusetts bar. The film told a semi-true story of how a woman was gang raped in a bar while another group of men bystanders cheered on the gang encouraging the violent act. Film resulted in the bystanders being convicted of a crime when in reality the men that witnessed the “real-life incident in 1938 at Big Ban’s bar” weren’t charged at all. (Pg. 115)
Katz explains how the male culture needs to be educated on how their behavior influences others. Behavior like sexual abuse and violence against women is understood to be inappropriate even if it takes place in their own home.
Alexis S.
It is said that boys and men from every class, race, ethnicity, and nationality face enormous pressure to be “one of the guys”. Every boy has memories of wanting to be chosen when a group of boys choose sides for playground games. Pressure does not end with childhood and adolescence, it begins there. In the chapter “Bystanders”, a 20 year old man might feel pressures from his buddies to drink lots of alcohol and then shout obscenities at women outside the car window. Also, a 40-year-old's friends might tease him about “who wears the pants” in his marriage if he make less money than his wife or has less professional success. This shows that throughout the durations of a man's life, from adolescence to teen to adult, they have pressure on them to “measure up” and “act like a man”. It is said that part of the challenge that men, young men, and adolescent boys face is to figure out how to “act like a man” and earn other men’s respect and approval. Some boys learn these powerful lessons of “manhood” from their fathers and some do not have fathers so they have nobody to teach them how to be a man unless they have a father figure. Boys and men are constantly looking at each other for cues about where in the man's “world” they will fit in. They want guidance to find out how they should dress, carry themselves, interact with others, what they should say and not say, and how “real men” treat women. There are many different types of masculinity that boys and men can fall under. There is the boy scout, the gang member, the boy on the athletic team, or the college guy who found himself in a fraternity. These male social groups provide a source of information to group members about what men value, and what they consider as wimpy and unworthy of respect.
ReplyDeleteErika D.
In the chapter, “Bystanders,” culture pressures boys and men to “measure up” and “act like a man” in a couple of ways. One of the examples is when Katz states, “A twenty-year-old man might feel pressure from his buddies to drink copious amounts of alcohol and shout obscenities at women out of car windows” (Ch.7 Pg.98). Nowadays, peer pressure is very common amongst men. Constantly, men want to prove to their friends about them being manly and will do anything it takes to prove it. Many people are influenced very easily and will call these women all sorts of names to prove to their friends that they’re tough and not “soft”. For example, I’ve grown up with a few friends who constantly call their female friends, “bitches” because they want to prove to us that they are tough guys and can call women anything they want. In reality, none of us care, but some of these guys think it’s cool or influenced and pressured by other friends. Another example Katz states in this chapter, “A forty-year-old friends might instead tease him about who wears the pants in his marriage if he makes less money or has less professional success than his wife and their disapproval-even if it is presented in a light hearted manner-might feed his resentment of her” (Ch.7, Pg.98). This is another great example that reminds me of one of my friends getting married soon. I have a friend who is getting arranged married soon. However, he was hesitant to marry this girl because she was a doctor and he was just an accountant. He didn’t want society to think or look down on him. In our Indian culture, many people look at the income and educational levels of people who are getting married. He kept thinking that all his friends will look down on him or tease him because all the other males make more money then their wives. We live in the 21st century and females are also human beings just like males. Females can also educate and get high paying jobs. For example, my sister married someone from India and she earns much more money then him. It doesn’t necessarily mean that the she wears the “pants” because she is earning more money. It is just pressure from culture that makes men think they’re less manly and somehow need to prove and act like a man.
ReplyDeleteWord Count: 392
In the chapter, “Bystanders,” culture pressures boys and men to “measure up” and “act like a man” in a couple of ways. One of the examples is when Katz states, “A twenty-year-old man might feel pressure from his buddies to drink copious amounts of alcohol and shout obscenities at women out of car windows” (Ch.7 Pg.98). Nowadays, peer pressure is very common amongst men. Constantly, men want to prove to their friends about them being manly and will do anything it takes to prove it. Many people are influenced very easily and will call these women all sorts of names to prove to their friends that they’re tough and not “soft”. For example, I’ve grown up with a few friends who constantly call their female friends, “bitches” because they want to prove to us that they are tough guys and can call women anything they want. In reality, none of us care, but some of these guys think it’s cool or influenced and pressured by other friends. Another example Katz states in this chapter, “A forty-year-old friends might instead tease him about who wears the pants in his marriage if he makes less money or has less professional success than his wife and their disapproval-even if it is presented in a light hearted manner-might feed his resentment of her” (Ch.7, Pg.98). This is another great example that reminds me of one of my friends getting married soon. I have a friend who is getting arranged married soon. However, he was hesitant to marry this girl because she was a doctor and he was just an accountant. He didn’t want society to think or look down on him. In our Indian culture, many people look at the income and educational levels of people who are getting married. He kept thinking that all his friends will look down on him or tease him because all the other males make more money then their wives. We live in the 21st century and females are also human beings just like males. Females can also educate and get high paying jobs. For example, my sister married someone from India and she earns much more money then him. It doesn’t necessarily mean that the she wears the “pants” because she is earning more money. It is just pressure from culture that makes men think they’re less manly and somehow need to prove and act like a man.
ReplyDeleteWord Count: 392
Mohemmad M.
Young boys are taught not to be emotional to become a man. Being a man you cannot cry or show signs of vulnerability. Men are raised differently than women in every culture. Boys are not expected to wash dishes but mown the lawn, they are not given chores that girls do. Boys are not allowed to cry, their parents teach them to man up when they are dealing with difficult situations. If a guy does girly things or shows any affections towards women they are given many offensive names like “gay”. Boys are expected to like sports, play with cars, and hang out with the guys. They are more pressure to party during college and also date. Because men are involved in parties and alcohol, friends encourage them to hit on girls and can lead to forcing the girl in having sex, otherwise his friends will call him of being gay.
ReplyDeleteMen are taught to provide a home and shelter for his wife. He is the one that has the power and control over what goes inside his home. The wife has to be a staying home mom and wait for the husband to get home. Women who are physically and emotional abused are afraid to stand up for themselves because they believe that is the only man that will love her. People who witness this situation do not speak up because they think the woman is happy and the man is always right. The wife probably did something to piss off the husband. When the husband lets his wife take control in their home, people start to gossip that he doesn’t wear the pants in the relationship. It downgrades his sexuality and becomes a problem to society. Men are expected to be controlling and dominant in the relationship. Because society approves this social roles, men are still raised to be strong and not vulnerable. Through movies, songs, and media, to be a man, you have to be manly enough.
- Denise M
The way society has pushed boys into becoming a “man” is conditioned in a negative way and leaves no room for the other; By other I mean the difference between men that should be elevated instead of discriminated against. The phrase “act like a man” basically means to not be a “sissy, bitch or fag,” and to be strong and hold dominance- all of these actions they hold are negative because when a man is dominant, he is usually hurting a women or engaging in negative behaviors but he is getting by through life because he is a man and it’s just what men do. And when a woman is being dominant and or strong there is no other action she is displaying other than being a “bitch.” Or when Katz says that women must take safety precautions like, “women being advised not to put their drinks down at parties; to park in well-lit areas; to recognize the warning signs of abusive relational behaviors, etc.” These precautions shouldn’t be rendered into people’s heads because if there was a safe world and safe men out there that didn’t have to feel pressured to measure up and be a man, none of this would be happening towards women. Bystanders lie on both spectrums and they are negative either way, but the way bystanders reflect on a men’s life is more crucial because of the entrapment these boys and men face by not being allowed to be individuals, be respectful and be positive. There is a lot of responsibility for men to hold these demeanors of being a man and when they don’t want to act like a “normal” man and want to speak out for women and stick up for what is right and not what is gendered to be right, they get bashed on and this is the pressure they are facing every day to fit in with. Jackson Katz states that they are average guys and many of them see the sexist treatment of women as normal. They behave toward women the way they think men are supposed to and these are bystanders when it comes to respecting men and respecting women. These boys will always be pressured into sticking by the “bro-code” and it is safer to stay silent than to speak out because you will be called names for doing so because a man who engaged in such behavior would lose status among his male peers and forfeit the approval of other males.
ReplyDelete-Alexis M.
In the Chapter “Bystander,” the cultural traditions of manhood bring a huge challenge to men because they have to “measure up” or “act like a man.” They are always pressured to live up to the standard and feel like they are entitled and should always demonstrate their masculinity to prove a point to other men. This happens gradually to men throughout their life because most men feel this way because they are taught through their fathers. Over time, they start to follow other rules involving their manhood the idea of the “The Bro Code.” This in a way was said as one of the rules that live up to the male society. There is a lot of male pressure of “every class, race, ethnicity, and nationality” that stimulate to this and it is said to be okay because it makes any man “one of the guys.” This causes men to be aggressive with women and be more negative towards them. An example “….a nineteen-year-old Berkeley engineer student, David Cash, stood outside the bathroom of a Las Vegas Casino as his friend sexually assaulted and murdered a seven-year-old girl. When asked why he didn’t intervene, even though he knew something terrible was happening, Cash asserted that it was none of his business…” (Pg.116) This was a way to brush out any serious incident because men are just following what they felt was what a man should do. “Potential perpetrators...most men do not identify themselves this way. In fact, many men who have been convicted of gender violence crimes still believe they are somehow different from the sorts of men who do terrible things to women.” In a case like this, Katz explains that men need to be more education in the choices they make and shouldn’t engage in situations like this. They need to somehow work on their skills involving communication, listening, and behaving to prevent serious situation between women and to change the idea of male culture.
ReplyDeleteMilan N.
In a day and age where the “Guy Code,” is perpetuated throughout society so seamlessly that it has become popularized as a television show on MTV, young boys begin to adapt the ideals and stereotypes that reinforce notions of masculine stereotypes which ultimately shapes their behavior for the future. The constant pressure faced by young boys to become a man by the dominant masculine culture is present in so many facets of life. From early adolescence, or rather earlier childhood, boy’s minds are consistently being taught how to “act like a man.” However the ideals and stereotypes they are learning are reinforcing notions of masculinity that deter young boys from becoming young men. “Part of the developmental challenge men face—especially adolescent boys and young men who are trying to establish successful adult identities is to figure out how to “act like a man” and thus earn other men’s respect and approval” (Katz, 2006, Pg. 119). This innate desire to be like and approved is in human nature, however for young boys the desire becomes a requirement, because if they do not mold themselves to the unattainable standards upheld by the masculine dominant culture, they will be penalized/punished. Though it is such a common occurrence to see men adapt to the conformities of masculinity, the trait is not biological, but rather lessons that are learned. In fact, some of the biggest lessons men face are the ones they learn from their fathers. (Katz, 2006, Pg. 119) However, even in the absence of a father men look at other men for social cues on how to appropriately act as a man. Perhaps the most “effective method,” men utilize to ensure men “measure up,” and “act like a man,” is through policing mechanisms. The first one being ostracizing men who speak out about injustices like sexism, often imposed by the men instigating the remarks. As Jackson Katz remarks, “Men are silent about these issues (domestic and sexual violence) because other men keep them silent. They do not want other men to challenge their sexism, so they send off a clear message to “stay out of my business.” (Katz, 2006, Pg. 125) They silence them by demoting their status as less of a man, and even feminine. As a result, “when men do not “measure up: in those terms—and many do not—they often keep their objections to themselves as not to threaten their standing in the group.” (Katz, 2006, Pg. 123) Though it contradicts the notion that standing up for justice exhibits masculine strength over contributing to the mob mentality, men would rather prevent being excluded from the dominant group. Furthermore, the second policing mechanism that men utilize is to take jabs at their sexuality. Where nearly every accidental touch exchanged between males is quickly greeted by the phrase, “no homo,” it becomes a learned behavior that stigmatizes the sexuality of homosexuals, so much so that it is something to be repulsed by. As Jackson Katz concludes the chapter, “many men will predictably conclude that it is better to suffer other men’s sexist treatment of women in silence than to run the risk of having someone think they might be gay. (Katz, 2006, Pg. 130). It’s truly unfortunate that these ideals are being instilled into the developing minds of young boys, hopefully with more awareness and a shift in cultural ideologies, these long-running stereotypes will cease to exist.
ReplyDeleteDorothy I.